What dreams may come....

Through a streak of creativity while working on my Thesis (I find this happens a lot after spending hours with it), I find myself working in the library on a gorgeous Friday afternoon in mid-February. I feel compelled to stop myself for a few minutes and record my thoughts at the moment. The sky is blue and the sun is sparkling on the Mon, and there are barges going by. This reminds me of going waterskiing in the Mon further north of here near Monongahela, PA when I was a kid, and deliberately having my dad take the boat over the wake of the barges so that we could go over the huge waves. It makes me think of just how far I have come in these 20-ish years since then, and how hard the journey has been at certain points in time. The Monongahela river has always seemed to run in my destiny...i grew up near it, and got my undergraduate degree by it. Now my master's degree is next to it as well.Landing in Morgantown I believe has probably been the best thing that has ever happened to me. Two to three years ago, I was a completely different person---most of you wouldn't have recognized me in terms of anything but physical appearance. That girl whose screaming ambition and stubborn "Lee Woman" (Thank you Mom, Mama, Aunt Mae, Aunt Fran, and Aunt Alda) was finally allowed to come out has now exploded and has given me wings. I have just spent the HAPPIEST two years of my life so far, and don't plan on stopping this joy anytime soon. I fell in love with the French language at the age of 16, and had NO idea that it would take me this far, on the brink of a Masters degree, about to spend a year studying in France, followed by the pursuit of a PhD. I had no idea that I would become fluent in it, and would come to speak the language as if it was simply pouring out of my heart. Two years ago when I was about to start this program I was scared out of my mind...I knew what I desperately wanted to do but didn't know if I could actually do it. Now I am saying to myself, "Yeah, I knew I could". I owe this to many people. Yes, I owe it partially to myself. I am prouder of myself than I have ever been in my life. I owe it partially to the friends I have made the last few years who are there every day to encourage me. I also owe it partially to the skeptics who said what I am doing can't be done. Thanks, you lit a fire under my feet. I owe it partially to my former professor who told me that I belong in a university and should go for a graduate degree (although I didn't listen to him initially). I owe it enormously to the select few French professors who brought me here in the first place, who have supported everything I have done, have criticized me when I SHOULD have been doing something differently, have encouraged me when I doubted myself, who I continually model myself after personally and intellectually, and with whom I have now formed friendships that will last forever. I have discovered a love for literature and have discovered that I CAN write. I don't ever expect to be cutting-edge in the field but I do know now that I can keep up. I can only hope and pray I will find a faculty like this in my future PhD program.And I owe EVERYTHING to my parents and my brother, who are my best friends. They not only have supported my choice and my passion for a lifetime of continuing education, but encouraged me to do it in the first place. They are the ones that were there when I was brokenhearted and confused in various situations and didn't know what to do next, and was terrified to go forward. They are the ones who tell their friends with enormous pride what I am doing and why. They are the ones who have been at every event, every graduation, every honor, (and every softball game where I sat the bench and played right field, spending most of my time chasing bugs and picking dandelions than watching for the occasional fly ball, even though my brother played baseball and other sports like it was second nature). I owe my very existence and personal happiness to them literally and figuratively. Many parents want their children to get a decent job, get married, and have children. Someday I will do all this, but only if it is right....and I know my family is with me on that.So here I am looking at the top of Woodburn Hall, realizing that in a few short months I will be doing what I have done many many times- moving on. I have experienced this sentimentality in multiple situations in the past but never this strongly. In a few short months I will leave Morgantown and step out of Chitwood hall permanently and step onto a plane that will take me to my "second country" for nine months.... and even though I will definitely be back here to visit, I more than likely will never study or live here again. I have things to do and people to see....the next step is waiting, and I can't wait to get there. I will miss it here, badly. I will always be linked to this place, this river, these mountains, and this campus, since it is the place where I really grew wings.....just like Liberté and Fantine.